Having only a vague idea of what we want to accomplish leads to confusion around what it takes to actually make that goal happen.

I have a confession to make. It’s the middle of January and the goal of restarting an exercise routine to elevate my mind and body is not on track. I’m admitting this so that I can have accountability and remain committed.

If you’re anything like me (or 99% of the population) we tend to make grand declarations especially in January. However, what I know from experience and from coaching clients is a mere declaration is never effective to get us to the finish line.  

Setting and reaching goals is a process and it starts with a mental transformation. What I find most often with clients is this:

1.     They only have a vague idea of what they want.

2.     They don’t identify their why.

3.     They don’t have clarity around what it takes to actually achieve the goal.

4.     When they get off track, they go ahead and quit.

5.     They don’t recognize their wins.

We’ve all heard from leaders, authors, self-help gurus, theologians, and CEOs how our thoughts are incredibly important and dictate the trajectory of our lives. A few quotes from some reputable sources on the subject prove this point.

“Whether you think you can or you think you can’t, you’re right.”   Henry Ford

 “Believe you can and you’re halfway there.”   Teddy Roosevelt

 “The happiness of your life depends on the quality of your thoughts.”   Marcus Aurelius

 “Our thoughts make us what we are.”   Dale Carnegie

 “Do not conform to the pattern of this world but be transformed by the renewing of our minds.”   Apostle Paul

These successful, impactful leaders understood that in order to create lasting change and reach big goals, we have to start with our thoughts. The Greek word for renewing is anakainôsis and it literally means renovation. The process of renovation requires some demolition. An undoing or unlearning of thoughts and ideas that are no longer serving our best interest.

Finding Your Fuel

When I decided to stop drinking, run competitively, and again when I started my business, I had to address all of the negative thoughts around my ability to accomplish those goals. I listed all the reasons I felt I couldn’t and then set about either creating solutions to the obstacles or decided to stop believing what wasn’t true. I broke the big goal down into small actionable steps that I could take over time. This process revealed to me my why in setting these goals.

My why, I realized, became the fuel and the courage that brought me through the fires and obstacles I faced on those transformational journeys. My why kept reminding me of all the reasons I wanted to reach my goals and defeated (multiple times) my negative or defeating thoughts. Philosopher Friedrich Nietzsche wrote, “He who has a why to live for can bear with almost any how.”  

If we can honestly answer why we want what we want (goal) and it aligns with our core values, we can move forward with resilience and perseverance—even when the how seems far off, and even when no one is cheering us on.

·      Our WHY keeps our focus on the goal

·      Our WHY pushes us to action

·      Our WHY elevates our confidence by focusing our mind on truths and away from negative untruths

·      Our WHY helps develop a plan

·      Our WHY helps us get back up when we fall down

Getting Clarity

Numbers one and three above go hand in hand. Having only a vague idea of what we want to accomplish leads to confusion around what it takes to actually make that goal happen. Here are some vague goals I’ve had clients share:

·      Get better at my job

·      Get more clients

·      Increase cashflow

·      Hire better employees

·      Create a better culture

To help myself and others, we need to get curious.  These simple questions, “What areas of your job do you struggle with or find difficult?” “What would have to happen to get more clients?” “Where in your budget is their room to trim?” “Describe the perfect employee.” “Describe the perfect culture you want to create?”—engage our creative brain which is where our problem-solving abilities reside. Operating in this intentional state is where the magic happens.

So, for example, when I decided to race competitively, I asked myself, “What does it take to be a competitive runner? My research provided plenty of information to get started on a plan that challenged me but was also reasonable. The first thing I did was set a timetable by actually signing up for a race. Now I was committed. I found a training plan that included both running and strength training and wrote it out in my calendar. When I missed a workout or run, (because life happens) I did my best to make up for it later in the day or the next. As I saw my progress and times improve, I gained more confidence and dedication to the goal. When I had a not-so-good day, I reminded myself that I did something good for my body and my mind. I made a point to celebrate my wins, even if it was a party of one. I placed second in my age group in that first race, and I had established new thought patterns and skills that would transfer to all areas of my life.  

My why, for this goal was to run a 50K with my son. We did it together and it is something I will cherish forever.

 When I decided I wanted to help small business owners work through issues and solve problems, I started by learning what they needed. I kept a log for years and I studied, interviewed experts, completed hours of training, and even hired a coach myself. These were the steps I had determined that would get me to the goal of launching my business. I started with my why, then worked out my how to create my plan. Today, I am blessed to partner with entrepreneurs creating solutions, establishing and planning goals, coaching them through obstacles using proven tools that apply on the racing trail and in the office.

 If you find yourself lagging in your goals, don’t despair.

Þ   Find your why

Þ   Renovate your mind

Þ   Get curious

Þ   Break it down

Þ   Write a Plan

Þ   Give yourself Grace

Þ   Get an accountability partner

Þ   Celebrate wins!

Back to my confession. I’m wrapping up this blog post now so that I can lace up my running shoes and stay committed. Thanks for the accountability!  As always, I’m here to help.